Valley of Fire Race

Well today was one of my toughest days ever physically, mentally, and emotionally.  About 4 months ago I decided I was going to participate in a half marathon.  There are a few ladies I work out with and run with during the week that have done it and I thought if they can I can.  Korina in particular really inspired me.  So without another doubt in my mind I began training.
It was simple at first 4 and 5 mile runs nothing to time consuming.  But as each week went by the long runs that we did on Saturday would have another mile added.  Every 3 weeks or so I would follow up with a Saturday of a shorter run of about 7 miles.  That way my body could rest a little and then I would be ready for the next long run.
All of my runs had went very well.  In fact by this point a friend of mine, Song Johns had said she would help me and do the race with me.  Be that support person for me during the race.  We did 9 then 10 then 11.  I thought "Wow" this is great.  I never thought I could do this but it seemed so easy this time around.  (I had tried in the past and got to about 7 and decided, forget it.)
But by this time Song was starting to worry a little.  See most of the time when you are training and running this much you are bound to have a bad run.  But not me, they all had been great.  Until the weekend of 12.  I had gotten up that morning feeling more nervous than usual for some reason.  To the point of being nauseous.  Then by about 3 miles in I was already thinking, "This Sucks".  At mile 6ish or 7 we were just finishing up a big hill and some of the women I run with that weren't running with us that day had decided to be an "aide" station.  It was such an emotional moment for me that I really had a hard time breathing let alone running.  Then it began to all go down hill.  By about mile 9 I started bawling.  I wanted to quit, walk, go home.  Then with the help of Song I got my act together ran some more.  At mile11ish I had nothing left.  It was all I could do to keep going.  I knew we still had a ways to go but there was nothing.  Finally I was done.  I got in the car drove Song home and then got myself home were I cried more.  It was THE worst run ever and that worried me got my doubts flowing.  What if I couldn't do the half what if my bad runs would just continue.  Song and Marlo both tried to reassure me.  You will be fine the bad run is out of the way.  I tried to stay positive and during the next 2 weeks went running the few miles I needed to so I was ready for my half.
Which brings me to today.  I flipped the sheets off me at 4:30 a.m. and walked out the door with everything I thought I would need for a half marathon.  The weather said a few things for that morning.  Picked Song up and met Marlo and the rest of the ladies at 5:15.  There were 9 of us in all. 7 of those 9 took part in the half.  The others did the 5K.  I felt good about it I was a little scared but deep down I felt like I could do it.  I thought the course and the weather would be manageable.  (I couldn't have been more wrong.) 
Once we were out there things seemed to go as they do for a race.  Everyone getting there numbers pinned on, using the bathroom, taking pictures, and stretching.  A breeze had started to blow some but wasn't bad and we realized that the course started out almost immediately going up a hill.  Well that hill turned out to be the first of MANY!!  And the breeze well that turned out to be just the beginning of what felt like20-30 mile an hour winds.  When you are in the desert that also means sand blowing.
I was doing pretty good for the first 6 miles I guess.  Song was entertaining me with her off and on singing abilities.  Every now and then I could see Marlo ahead or passing. (She's fast so I knew that I wasn't doing bad on timing when I saw her.)  At about mile 7 1/2 I was at the turn around point.  I was tired, out of breath, and SICK of hills and wind.  It was funny because on our way up the first hill someone behind said, "this isn't a hill its a mountain".  She couldn't have been more right. 
After turning around and heading back I knew there would be lots of "mountains" to climb.  We had done uphill a lot in our training but not to this extent.  My legs couldn't take it.  Around mile 8 the calves really started feeling it.  Try doing calf raises for an hour straight that's how they felt.  At mile 9 Song new I was fighting for every step.  She would say come on Monica you can do this.  You've trained for it.  There's only 4 miles left.  In some ways that would help me I thought only 4 I can do that.  Then I would start up another "mountain".  Within several steps my pace would instantly slow.  At one point I started walking and Song actually got behind me and started pushing me.  It was actually great I thought oh I can do it I'm going.  But shortly there after I would slow again and just fight for that next step.
By mile 10-11 a snail could have moved faster than my run and each time I had to go up it was a devastating set back.  Song said every time she would look ahead and see that there was another incline she was just hoping I didn't see it.  My mind at this point played a big part.  I would keep moving when I thought of my family but if I didn't I would start thinking, I cant go any further, I'm done.  My legs are not going to carry me. I can't catch my breath.  And then Song would yell.  You can do it.  I want to hear you say it.  So I would.  Very quietly I would say "I can do it".  As long as the positive thought was there it did help.  Of course it was hard for me to say anything.  So it didn't last long.  But with everything there is always an end.  An end to the hills an end to the sand blasting, and an end to the race.  Song decided it was best for me to run the last bit by myself so she took off.  As I ran across the finish line and saw and heard all my friends cheering me on and there to hug me it was so overwhelming.  Brings tears and chills to me thinking about it.  I had finished.
I'm so grateful for my friends there to support me and my family supporting me in spirit.  Thanks to all of you.  I love you very much.

L to R: April McCourt, Monta Lindsay, Sarah Ewell, Marlo Gifford, Jacqueline Fabian, Christy Longo, Song Johns, Me, Korina Manor

Coming to the end.

Crossing the Finish.